The Night Before “Wow, that was amazing!” With a grunt of agreement, Mamoru rolled over on his back, breathing heavily as he attempted to regain his bearings. Every time with Usagi was incredible, but he had to admit that they had outdone themselves that time. Morning sex truly was the best kind, and Usagi had never looked so sexy, the sunlight filtering in through the window above his bed to shower her naked, glistening body with an otherworldly glow. As Usagi snuggled up to him, she sighed in contentment. “I can’t believe that after tomorrow, I get to spend the rest of my life waking up next to you every morning,” she said. “Don’t you do that already, Usa-ko?” he chuckled, twirling a strand of her long, unbound hair around his finger. “You spend the night here more often than you do your own house.” “Do I?” “When was the last time you remember sleeping in your own bed?” Her brow furrowed, deep in thought as she considered the question. “Um…maybe two weeks ago?” Usagi guessed. “When you were working the late shift at the hospital, so I decided to start packing my things to move in here?” She laughed, tracing small circles on his chest. “Okay, point taken. But, still, don’t you think it’ll be different when we’re husband and wife? Better?” “How so?” Honestly, Mamoru couldn’t imagine how things could get any better than they already were and hoped things wouldn‘t change too much once they were married. She shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe we’ll feel more connected, or something.” “Maybe,” he said, lifting up the covers and planting himself between Usagi’s legs. “But if you ask me, I happen to think we’re connected enough already.” He hadn’t quite recovered from their last round, but, eager to please his bride-to-be, he began kissing his way down Usagi’s nude body, Usagi moaning in anticipation of what was to come. Just when he was about to reach her sweet spot, however, Usagi abruptly sat back up, looking around the room for something. “Wait! What time is it?” Sighing, Mamoru reluctantly emerged from underneath the blankets and reached for the watch sitting on his nightstand to check the time. The week before, Usagi had broken his alarm clock while hitting the “snooze” button with a little too much force, and he had yet to buy a replacement. “It’s almost noon,” he told her, smiling as he playfully thwapped her on the nose. “You know, you are becoming quite the bad influence on me, Tsukino Usagi. Thank goodness I don’t have to go in to the hospital today.” “Noon?!” Pushing Mamoru off her with no explanation, Usagi jumped out of bed and headed straight to the bathroom. A few seconds later, Mamoru heard a rush of water coming from his Western-style shower. He raised his eyebrows in mild surprise, then shrugged, climbing out of bed himself and following her. They had never tried anything in the shower before, but he was nothing if not open to new experiences when it came to their love life. “Oh, Rei-chan is going to scold me again!” Usagi whined when she noticed Mamoru come in. “Mamo-chan, why did you let me sleep in so late?” From the bathroom doorway, Mamoru frowned. “What’s wrong?” he asked, disappointed that Usagi appeared to be taking an actual shower. “I’m going to be late to my hen party!” “Hen party?” “It’s a Western wedding tradition Minako-chan picked up when she lived in London. I think it’s called a bachelorette party in America,” Usagi explained as she began lathering up. “Basically, the bride and a few of her closest girlfriends get together for one final girls’ day out before the wedding. It’s supposed to celebrate the bride’s last moments as a single woman, or something like that. I’m not exactly sure what Minako-chan has planned, but I’m supposed to meet her and the other girls at twelve-thirty at Hikawa.” “You’re leaving?” That was news to him. “I thought we were going to spend the day together. That’s why I requested today off.” “I’m sorry, Mamo-chan.” After rinsing off, Usagi turned off the shower and stepped out, wrapping her wet body in a fluffy white towel. “I didn’t even know about it myself until Minako-chan told me about it yesterday. The girls kind of sprung it on me last minute.” “It’s fine,” Mamoru sighed. He couldn’t very well deny Usagi’s friends any opportunity to throw a party. They would never let him hear the end of it, especially Minako. Besides, there were a few last minute things he needed to take care of before tomorrow, which would be easier to do if Usagi wasn‘t around, distracting him with that gorgeous body of hers. “When will you be back?” Even if they couldn’t spend the day together, there was always later that night. Usagi bit her lip. “Um, well, the thing is, we were planning to spend the night at Hikawa as well,” she confessed. “The shrine is close to the hotel, and Minako-chan says it is considered bad luck for the bride and groom to spend the night together the night before the wedding, so…” “So I won’t see you again until tomorrow? “You don’t mind, do you?” Usagi asked, placing her hands on his bare chest, her eyes looking downward. “I mean, I don’t have to go, if you don’t want me to. Minako-chan will be disappointed, but - -” Mamoru covered her hands with his own, giving them a gentle squeeze. “No, you should go have fun with your friends,” he insisted. “I’ll have you to myself soon enough.” “True.” At the reminder, Usagi looked back up and smiled. “By this time tomorrow, I will be your wife, until death do us part.” As had been happening with some frequency as of late, for reasons he couldn’t quite understand, Mamoru felt his stomach do a little somersault at the words, “until death do us part”. Ignoring it, however, he managed to force a smile, caressing Usagi’s cheek. “I can’t wait.” “Me neither.” Wrapping her arms around his neck, Usagi pressed herself against him and whispered in his ear: “And believe me, once we’re on our honeymoon, I’ll more than make it up to you for tonight.” He was definitely primed for another round now. “Why not make it up to me now?” he asked, and began kissing her. Usagi, though initially responding, pulled away. “Don’t tempt me, Mamo-chan!” she scolded, swatting at his arm. “I’m going to be late enough as it is.” “In that case, a few more minutes won’t hurt,” Mamoru said, reaching for her towel and letting it fall to the floor. He then turned around and began pulling her back toward the shower. “Right?” Usagi giggled as he turned on the water. “Well, when you put it that way…” ***** By the time Usagi finally left the apartment, it was well after the time she was supposed to have met her friends for the party. At any other time, Mamoru might have felt guilty for keeping her, especially considering he was usually the one scolding her for her chronic lateness, but he was in far too good a mood to care. Who knew that shower sex could be so…well, sexy? They would definitely have to do a lot more of that on their honeymoon. Reliving the scene in his head, Mamoru smiled as he entered Osaka Jewelers, the bell above the door announcing his entrance. Osaka Naru, Usagi’s best friend since grade school and the daughter of the store’s owner, turned around at the sound. “Well, somebody sure looks cheerful today,” she said, greeting him with a smile of her own when he came up to the counter. “Good afternoon, Mamoru-san. Are you here for Usagi-chan‘s ring?” He nodded, then frowned in confusion. “Hey, shouldn’t you be at Usa-ko’s hen party, or whatever it’s called?” Mamoru asked, finding it strange that Usagi’s maid of honor wasn’t with the others. Naru sighed as she began looking through the tote holding jewelry that needed to be picked up by their owners. “I should, but I couldn’t go, since it was so last minute. Unfortunately, Okaa-san is at a conference this weekend, and she asked me to look after the store while she’s gone,” she explained. “Don’t worry, though. I’ve already found somebody to take over for me tomorrow. We wouldn’t miss the wedding for the world,” Naru assured him before he could ask, referring to herself and her long-time boyfriend, Umino Gurio. “I’m glad. Usako and I would have been really disappointed if you weren’t able to come.” “Are you kidding? Usagi-chan and I have been planning our dream weddings ever since we were kids. Nothing would keep me away from seeing her dream come true.” Selecting one of the bags from the tote, having found the one with his name on it, Naru opened the bag and pulled out a small velvet box, which she slid across the counter to Mamoru. “Here’s the ring. I do hope you like it. I happen to think it is some of Okaa-san’s best work. It was a difficult project, but she really worked hard to get it just right.” Mamoru picked up the box and opened it, pleased with what he saw. The ring was a custom design he helped to create with Mrs. Osaka. Unlike most wedding bands, which were made with either yellow gold, white gold, or platinum, he had chosen to use rose gold to complement the engagement ring he had given her, and all around the band, a vine of roses had been engraved, the petals of the flowers colored in by silver and gold. Mamoru knew Usagi would love it. “It’s perfect,” Mamoru said, snapping the box close, and Naru beamed. “I think so, too,” she said. “Usagi-chan will be thrilled.” “I certainly hope so.” “What about the inscription?” Naru asked when he was about to put the ring in his pocket. “Is it correct?” “Oh, right!” Mamoru had almost forgotten about the inscription he had asked to be engraved on the inside of the band. Again opening the box, he took out the ring and read aloud the four simple words scrawled on the inside. “Forever yours, for eternity.” Naru let out a wistful sigh. “Usagi-chan is so lucky. What a romantic inscription!” “Y-Yeah,” Mamoru said, placing the ring back in the box and stuffing it in his pocket. He didn’t know why, but he suddenly felt a knot form in the pit of his stomach at the innocent words he’d so lovingly chosen just a couple of months ago. He shook it off as simply pre-wedding jitters. “So, what do I owe you again?” Naru told him the amount, and after paying for the ring, Mamoru left the jewelry store, no longer as cheerful as he had been earlier. Despite his attempts to ignore it, the knot in his stomach felt even tighter, almost physically painful, especially when he reached into his pocket and wrapped his hand around the small velvet box containing Usagi’s ring. For a moment, he wondered if maybe the ring had been cursed by an enemy. It wouldn’t be the first time Naru’s mother’s store had been targeted by a villain. In fact, Osaka Jewelers had been the site of Usagi’s first battle as Sailor Moon and his as Tuxedo Kamen, as well as their memorable first meeting in their civilian identities, when Usagi had accidentally chucked her failed test in his face. However, upon closer examination, Mamoru didn’t sense anything particularly “evil” about the ring. It wasn’t sucking any of his energy, and while he was no Rei when it came to reading auras, the ring seemed perfectly innocent to him. Besides, things had been peaceful ever since the battle with Galaxia almost six years ago. There was little reason to suspect foul play. Shrugging, he again put the ring away and headed onto his next stop on his list of errands, putting the matter completely out of his mind. ***** When Mamoru finally arrived back home at his apartment, it was almost seven. His pre-wedding errands had taken far longer than he had expected. In light of that, it was probably a good thing that Usagi had gone to her hen party after all, although he certainly missed coming home to the smell of burnt food that usually perfumed his apartment, thanks to Usagi’s well-meaning, but ultimately disastrous, attempts to make him a homemade dinner every night as part of what she cutely called “wife practice.” After tossing the garment bag containing his tuxedo over the back of his armchair, Mamoru headed to the kitchen and heated up some leftovers from last night‘s meal. Like most of Usagi’s cooking, it didn’t taste any better the second time around, but eating it made Mamoru miss her a little less. He then went to his bedroom, taking a seat at his desk and pulling out a sheet of notebook paper, half- filled with crossed out sentences. Like the hen party, it was another one of Minako’s Westernized wedding ideas. Instead of saying the traditional vows, she had suggested to Usagi that they should both write their own vows to each other, an idea which Usagi had loved. Usagi thought personalized vows would make the wedding more romantic, but, honestly, Mamoru thought the traditional vows were just fine. It was difficult enough for him to express his feelings to Usagi in private; he didn’t exactly relish the thought of declaring how he felt to a roomful of friends and family in his own words. Still, he had agreed, as he had to almost all of Usagi’s wedding requests. To Mamoru, the wedding itself wasn’t terribly important, but, like Naru had said earlier, Usagi had been dreaming of her wedding day since she was a little girl, and Mamoru was determined to make it the happiest day of her life. Unfortunately, despite having worked on his vows for over two weeks, Mamoru didn’t even have a rough draft prepared. Everything he wrote down either sounded too trite or too corny, which was quite an accomplishment considering some of the things he sprouted when fighting as Tuxedo Kamen. That was different, though. When his face was behind a mask, he had no problems playing the romantic hero. There was safety behind that mask. The real Mamoru, however, was far more pragmatic and introverted, not prone to speaking in flowery haiku. “Maybe I should just show up at the wedding as Tuxedo Kamen,” Mamoru mused aloud, twirling his pen around his fingers like a baton after crossing out yet another unusable sentence. “He’d know exactly what to say.” Hoping for some inspiration, he took the small box containing Usagi’s ring out of his pocket and opened it, picking up the ring between his pointer finger and thumb to admire the fine craftsmanship. Naru’s mother truly had done a wonderful job on it. He then squinted, struggling in the dim lights of his room to reread the words engraved on the inside: Forever yours, for eternity. As had happened earlier at the jewelry store, Mamoru felt his insides clinch at the vow. “Maybe the leftovers weren’t such a good idea,” he weakly joked, despite knowing that his stomach problems had nothing to do with food poisoning. No matter how terrible Usagi’s cooking was, to her credit, it had never made him sick. He sighed, grasping the tiny ring in his fist, and leaned back in his chair so that he was looking up at the ceiling. What was the matter with him? He’d heard of cold feet before, but this felt like more than just a simple case of the nerves. More like absolute and utter dread. *You‘re being silly, Mamoru,* he thought to himself, throwing his arm over his eyes. *You love Usa-ko. We were destined to be together long before either of us were even born, and we’re fated to become the King and Queen of Earth, parents of a beautiful, loving daughter. What is there to fear? What more could you possibly want?* Unable to come up with a satisfactory answer, Mamoru sat back up and tossed the ring on the desk beside the box. He then crumpled up the sheet of paper he’d been writing his vows on, realizing not a single word of it was usable, and shot it into the nearby wastebasket like a basketball player. The makeshift ball hit the side of the can before falling soundlessly to the floor, but Mamoru barely noticed, resting his head down on the desk so that he was eye level with a framed photograph of Usagi, Chibi-Usa, and himself playing on the swings at the park. The three of them looked so happy and carefree together, but Mamoru couldn’t help but wonder if it would be the same in the future, or if their destined roles as monarchs would keep them too busy to indulge in such frivolities. Even though he had seen the future with his own eyes, things had been far from typical, what with Neo-Queen Serenity frozen inside a prison of crystal and his future self injured and only able to move through a hologram, not to mention the fact that they had been at war with those of the Black Moon. Mamoru could tell that King Endymion had loved his wife and daughter very much, but was he really happy with the way his life had gone? Did he regret anything? Mamoru had never in his wildest dreams expected his life to turn out this way. He had wanted to be a doctor, not a king, and while he had always wanted a family to make up for the one he had lost when he was only six years old, he never really imagined himself getting married so young. Was Usagi even the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, or were they only together because of their past lives as Prince Endymion and Princess Serenity? He loved her, but how much of that love was for Usagi herself, and not for the memory of a girl he had loved in a previous life? If they had just been two random people with no ties to each other, would they have fallen in love? He shook his head, trying to erase the dark thoughts from his mind, but they were difficult to ignore. After attempting to return to his vow writing with little success, Mamoru finally tossed the pen aside and stood up, deciding he needed a break. Riding his motorcycle usually cleared his head, so grabbing his keys, he headed down to the garage. He had no destination in mind. He just needed to ride. ***** When Mamoru’s motorcycle finally came to a stop, he found himself stalled in the driveway leading up to a pretty little two- story cottage, located just outside the Tokyo city limits. A familiar yellow convertible was parked out front, meaning the occupants were at home, although the only visible light coming from the house came from the living room on the first floor. Mamoru had no idea what had possessed him to drive all the way to the house where the Outer Senshi lived as a makeshift family. He wasn’t particularly close to any of them, except possibly Setsuna. They weren’t best friends or anything like that, but Mamoru did enjoy her company on occasion, finding the conversation always interesting and thought-provoking. As someone who had lived for countless millennia, Setsuna was knowledgeable in a number of different, varied areas, and he could usually count on her to give his brain an exercise. “Maybe that’s why I came here tonight,” he mused, thinking aloud as he killed the engine and took off his helmet. “If anybody can help me overcome my doubts about the wedding, it’s Setsuna-san. She‘ll talk some sense into me.” After all, she was the guardian of time. It was her job to make certain the timeline stayed relatively intact, and that included the existence of Crystal Tokyo. Mamoru dismounted the bike and headed up to the front door, deciding he would stay. After a moment of hesitation, his finger extended to ring doorbell, but, at the last moment, he knocked softly instead, not wanting to risk waking up anybody who might be asleep. He silently hoped that Setsuna would be the one to answer. His prayer was answered when a dark-skinned woman with hunter green hair opened the door, obviously surprised to see him. Setsuna, who was dressed for bed in a lacy black chemise nightgown and a satin robe, quickly finished tying her belt. “Mamoru -san!” “Sorry it’s so late,” he apologized, his hands stuffed in the pockets of his jeans. “May I come in?” She stepped aside, allowing him entry. “Of course,” she said. “This is a surprise. Shouldn’t you be out having one last night of freedom before the big day?” “I wasn’t in the mood.” After switching into a pair of guest slippers, Mamoru looked around, relieved when nobody else came to greet him. “Are you the only one up?” A small smile crossed Setsuna’s lips. “I’ve always been a bit of a night owl,” she admitted. “Haruka-san and the others retired to bed hours ago. Michiru-san, especially, wanted to get her beauty sleep in order to look her best for tomorrow.” “Good.” Mamoru didn’t want to risk anybody overhearing what he planned to discuss with the time guardian. He wasn’t even sure he wanted to tell Setsuna, although he knew she was possibly the only person who might be able to put his mind at ease about tomorrow. Sensing his anxiety, Setsuna frowned. “You seem a little tense. Why don’t I brew us some chamomile tea? Have a seat.” “Thanks.” While Setsuna left for the kitchen to brew the tea, Mamoru plopped down on the couch, accidentally knocking over the book she had left open, face-down, on the arm. She must have been doing some late-night reading before he arrived. He picked up the book -- amusingly, "The Time Machine" by H.G. Wells -- and set it on the coffee table, then sat back, wiping his suddenly sweaty hands on the knees of his pants. He felt like a little boy being sent to the principal’s office for the first time and wondered if coming here had really been such a great idea. A few minutes later, Setsuna reappeared in the living room, carrying a tray, which she set down on the coffee table beside the book. “Sorry, I lost your place,” Mamoru said, despite the fact she hadn’t mentioned anything about the misplaced book. “It fell off the arm of the couch when I sat down.” She waved it off as if it was nothing and began pouring the tea. “It’s fine. I’ve read that book so many times over the years, I practically know it by heart. I know exactly where I left off,” Setsuna said, handing him one of the cups. “Here, this should help you relax.” Mamoru took a hesitant sip. He normally preferred green tea, but he had to admit the chamomile was good. “Thanks. I appreciate it.” After pouring herself a cup as well, Setsuna joined Mamoru on the couch. Timeless eyes the color of garnet stared at him expectantly, waiting for him to say something more, but Mamoru was finding it difficult to broach the subject of tomorrow. Perhaps sensing his unease, Setsuna took it upon herself to begin the conversation. “Would you like to talk about it?” Mamoru looked up, surprised. Had she already guessed the reason for his unexpected visit? “About what?” “About whatever it is that brought you here, of all places, tonight, the night before your wedding,” Setsuna said, her left eyebrow arched. “Cold feet?” “I…suppose you could say that.” Mamoru sighed, setting his tea cup back on the tray and running his hand nervously through his hair. “Tell me something, Setsuna-san,” he said after a short pause to gather his thoughts. “I know that Usa-ko and I are destined to become king and queen of Crystal Tokyo and parents to a wonderful daughter, but will we be truly happy together?” “You and Usagi-chan? I don’t know.” That was not the answer Mamoru had been hoping to hear. “But you’re the guardian of time. Surely, you must --” Setsuna shook her head before he could even finish the sentence. “I’ve seen many futures,” she said, her voice low and soft. “Most are happy. Some are sad, even painful.” “Then…there is more than one future?” “Of course.” Setsuna gave him a moment to absorb that bombshell, then continued. “Time is not a linear thing, Mamoru-san. Every decision we humans make, major or minor, affects what kind of future we will have.” She paused again. “Think of time like a tree,” she suggested. “The past is the tree’s roots, the foundation. Similar to how the roots provide nourishment to the tree, the past provides us with knowledge, and without that knowledge, we would not be where we are today. That’s why the study of history and archeology is so important, even in present times. “The present is the tree’s trunk. That metaphor should be simple enough to understand without explanation. “As for the future, think of the tree’s branches and twigs as a path. They represent all the different choices you can make in the present, but if you were to choose one leaf -- or perhaps I should say one future -- among all the rest, you could clearly trace the path of that leaf all the way back down to the roots.” After finishing her explanation, Setsuna frowned, not seeming pleased with how she had phrased things. “That’s a rather simplified way to look at time, which is actually far more complicated than that, but I think you get the basic, general idea.” Mamoru, however, was still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that the future they had all once taken for granted as being set in stone was actually fluid, and that one small disturbance in the stream of time could lead to a radically different future. “Are you saying that the future we saw when we traveled to the 30th century to fight the Black Moon Clan might not be the actual future that comes to fruition?” he asked, his voice hoarse. “Because of the inherent problems with time travel, which is not as simple as Mr. Wells might lead us to believe --” she nodded toward the book on the coffee table, “-- due to the possible creation of time paradoxes, that leaf has already withered and fallen to the ground, along with all the other dead futures.” “Then Crystal Tokyo, and Chibi-Usa…” Mamoru massaged at his chest, his heart aching at the thought of never being able to meet his future daughter again. He may have had his concerns about marrying Usagi, but the one thing that had always made the idea of marriage seem worthwhile was Chibi-Usa, his little Usagi. Setsuna smiled, patting his knee in reassurance. “Not to worry. Small Lady has not completely disappeared from the timeline. There are still similar leaves left on the tree. It is only a matter of traveling the right branches to get there.” “But which branches are the right ones?” To himself, he added, “And do I really want to pick that leaf?” He had thought he had asked that last question in his head, but Setsuna’s smile faded, and her eyes were filled with concern. “This is more than just a minor case of cold feet, isn’t? Are you having second thoughts about marrying Usagi-chan, Mamoru-san?” “No, of course not!” Mamoru exclaimed, jumping up from his seat on the couch. “I love Usa-ko. At least, I think I do.” Realizing that didn’t come out the way he wanted, he shook his head. “I mean, I know I do, but --” Again, Setsuna interrupted. “You love her, but you aren’t sure that she’s ‘the one’ you want to spend the rest of your life with. Is that what you are trying to say?” Mamoru sat back down, his head in his hands. He couldn’t even bear to look at Setsuna, afraid to see the disappointment and anger that was certain to be in her garnet eyes. Her loyalty laid first and foremost with Usagi, not him; she had no reason to sympathize with his troubles, especially when they were going to hurt her princess in the process. Why did he ever think that coming to one of Usagi’s friends about his doubts about the wedding was a good idea? He should have gone to Motoki or Asanuma instead. “I’m a horrible, horrible person, aren‘t I?” he muttered bitterly, letting out a heavy sigh. “The wedding is tomorrow! It should be the happiest day of our lives, yet every time I think about the whole ’until death do us part’ section of the ceremony, I get this huge knot in my stomach, and I feel like I want to hurl. That’s not normal, is it?” There was a long pause, then, to his surprise, Mamoru felt Setsuna’s hand rest on his shoulder, comforting instead of threatening. “You are not a horrible person, Mamoru-san,” she said softly. “I think it’s only natural to have some doubts about making such a huge commitment. Even when two people love each other, marriage can be difficult. It’s not something to be taken lightly, especially for you and Usagi-chan. Unless one of you chooses a different branch, chances are, you will be together for a very long time.” “Over a millennia,” Mamoru remembered, thinking again of what they had seen in the 30th century. If only they had been able to see more, maybe he wouldn’t feel so nervous about tomorrow… He looked up. “But you just said the future we saw won‘t come to pass because of the time traveling we did,” he reminded her. “Like I said, there are similar leaves still left on the tree, although they may not remain there for long.” Setsuna pursed her lips, looking grim. “There’s a fork in the branch, Mamoru-san. The futures of Crystal Tokyo and Small Lady greatly depend on what choice you make tomorrow. You must decide which branch will continue to thrive and grow. Choose one way, and you will be on the path to making a future with Crystal Tokyo a reality.” “And if I choose the other?” he asked, almost afraid to hear the answer. “Then you choose a future unknown to you.” A future unknown to him… In a lot of ways, there was something attractive about an unknown future. He could do whatever he wanted, be whoever he wanted. Instead of becoming King of Earth, he could continue with his medical studies and become a doctor, as he had always planned. He could create a future of his own choosing, not one he felt destined to strive toward because of his past life as Prince Endymion. Yet, there was no guarantee he would be any more happy in that future than one similar to the one he had seen with his own eyes, which, he had to admit, appeared to be quite good, minus the trouble with the Black Moon. “Do you know what that future is?” Mamoru asked. “Is it a good future, or one of the sad ones you spoke of before? Will I be happy? Will Usa-ko?” “Even if I did know the answers to your questions, I would not tell you,” Setsuna declared. “This is a decision you must make for yourself, of your own free will.” Mamoru sighed. “I had a feeling you would say that.” He rested his head back against the couch, running a hand through his rumpled hair. “What am I going to do, Setsuna-san?” he moaned. “The last thing I want to do is hurt Usa-ko, but if I marry her out of a sense of obligation, that would be as bad as leaving her at the altar. She deserves to be with somebody who knows exactly what he wants, not somebody like me, who is so full of hesitation and doubt. If only I knew for certain that a life with Usa-ko is what I really want, and not something I feel I should want…” Setsuna took a sip of her tea, a thoughtful look on her face. She then set the cup back on the coffee table and turned so her entire body was facing Mamoru. “Mamoru-san, may I ask you a question?” she asked. “Yeah, sure, go ahead,” he said with a low chuckle, reaching for his cup of lukewarm tea. “It’s not like l have anything to hide any more, after what I’ve just admitted. Ask me anything you want. I am an open book.” “In that case…do you find me attractive?” Mamoru almost spit out his tea in surprise. Out of all the questions he imagined her asking, that was definitely not one of them. “D-Do I what?” “I know it’s a strange thing to ask,” she admitted, “especially the night before your wedding, but answer as honestly as you can. I’ll hold no judgment against you.” “Setsuna-san, you are drop-dead gorgeous, not to mention one of the kindest, most intelligent people I‘ve ever met. You know that,” Mamoru said, not exactly answering her highly-inappropriate and uncomfortable question. He may have just told Setsuna he was an open book, but even in books, a person sometimes had to read between the lines. “I don’t think there’s a straight man alive who would be able to resist you, should you set your sights on him.” Wordlessly, Setsuna took Mamoru’s cup from his hands, setting it beside hers. “Even you?” she asked before placing her hands on his cheeks and pressing her mouth against his. Mamoru never had the chance to answer. His traitorous lips responded on their own, his brain on temporary shutdown due to the shock to his system. Her lips were so soft…. It wasn’t until Setsuna removed her hands from his face and began unbuttoning his shirt that Mamoru started to recover control over his thoughts and realized what was happening. “Setsuna-san, this --” “Forget about Usagi-chan.” She stood up and disrobed, revealing the sexy lace chemise she wore underneath. Setsuna then straddled his lap, her arms wrapped around his neck. “Do you desire me?” she asked, kissing him again, deeper and more passionate than before. Despite having regained control over most of his body, there was one part of him that had a mind of its own, instinctively responding to the half-naked woman on top of him. Mamoru tried his best to ignore his arousal, but he couldn’t deny his baser desires for long. His hands were soon on her hips, and he was kissing her back with equal fervor. It would be so easy to let himself completely lose what little control he had left. After all, tonight was the night before his wedding; wasn’t this what he was supposed to do? Have one last taste of freedom before accepting the metaphorical ball and chain of marriage? Granted, that usually meant going to a strip club with a bunch of male friends and getting piss-drunk, but Mamoru had no doubt that more than a few grooms over the years had ended up sleeping with one of the strippers. But Setsuna was no stripper; she was one of Usagi’s closest and dearest friends. If Usagi ever found out about this… “Forget about Usagi-chan.” It was as if Setsuna had somehow read his mind. Getting back to where they had left off earlier, Setsuna finished unbuttoning his shirt, her hands caressing his bare chest with a feather touch. “Tonight, she doesn’t exist. Tonight, you are free.” Free? Was that what he wanted, his freedom? “Do you desire me?” she asked again, and this time, Mamoru had his answer. “Yes,” he said huskily, kissing her neck. “Yes, I desire you.” Pushing the image of Usagi out of his mind, his hands roamed up from Setsuna’s hips to her shoulders, pulling down the thin spaghetti straps that held up her nightgown so that he could better explore her exotic cocoa skin. Setsuna moaned as his lips traveled along her collar bone and shoulder blades, gasping when he reached the area just above her almost-exposed breasts. Mamoru wanted to see all of her, so he grabbed the hem of the chemise and pulled it up over her head, tossing it aside. She was completely nude except for a tiny black thong that left very little to the imagination. “You are beautiful,” he breathed, drinking in the glorious sight of her before yanking off his shirt and flipping them over so they lay length-wise on the couch, him on top of her. The kisses continued, Setsuna’s long legs wrapped around him as he continued exploring her body with his hands. Mamoru felt himself coming close to the brink several times, despite not even being inside her yet, but managed to control himself. He wanted this night to last as long as possible, putting off the decision he knew he still had to make. For now, however, he just wanted to forget everything and be free of the chains of destiny, even if it was just for one night…even if it was wrong. When Mamoru didn’t think he could bear it any longer, he fumbled for the condom he kept in his wallet and handed it to Setsuna. He then unzipped his pants, unable to get them off fast enough for his liking. Setsuna rolled the condom on expertly, but just as he was about to bend down and kiss her again, she placed a hand on his chest, stopping him. Mamoru swore silently in his head. “Do you love me?” she asked, Mamoru looking down at her in confusion. “What?” She repeated the question, slower and with emphasis on each word. “Do you love me?” Mamoru shook his head. “No.” The answer came automatically to his lips, the image of an odango-haired blonde flashing in his head. “No, I love Usa-ko.” “Even if she doesn’t exist?” “If she doesn’t exist, then I don’t exist. She’s my everything.” Realizing the truth of those words, Mamoru pushed himself off of Setsuna and began getting dressed. “I’m sorry, I can’t do this, Setsuna-san,” he apologized. “My body desires you, but my heart and soul belong to Usa-ko. They always have, and they always will. I…can‘t betray her like this.” He expected Setsuna to be angry, or at that very least, disappointed, so Mamoru was surprised when he glanced over at her still sitting on the couch and found her smiling as she tied her robe over her naked body. “Don’t be sorry,” she said. “There’s nothing to apologize for. You’ve found your answer.” “My answer?” He frowned, then turned on his heel so that he was fully facing Setsuna. “Wait a minute. Was this just now --” “Mamoru-san, it’s time for you to go home and get back to bed,” Setsuna said, standing up and helping him with the last few buttons on his shirt. She completely avoided answering his unasked question. “Tomorrow is a big day. You don’t want Usagi-chan to see you up at the altar, looking like the living dead, do you?” “Setsuna-san…” He reached for one of her hands, but she pulled it away to smooth down the collar of his shirt. It was a strangely mother-like gesture in light of what they had almost done, followed by a chaste kiss on the cheek. “You’ve chosen your leaf, Mamoru-san,” she said, “and you chose it of your own free will. That was what you wanted, wasn’t it? In your heart of hearts, you always knew you wanted a life with Usagi-chan; you just wanted to make that decision for yourself, and you have.” “But --” She placed a finger on his lips, silencing him. “I’ll see you tomorrow at the wedding, Mamoru-san.” Mamoru nodded, realizing that Setsuna had no intention of ever admitting her little “seduction” had been all just an act to get him to realize just how much he loved Usagi. However, as he began walking out of the house and back to his bike, he turned around and waved to the time guardian, who was standing in the doorway, watching him leave. “Thank you!” he called out. “For everything!” Setsuna merely smiled her mysterious smile and headed back inside. ***** Instead of heading straight back to his apartment after leaving Setsuna‘s house, Mamoru made a detour to a small Shinto shrine in the Sendaizakaue area. Now that he knew what it was he really wanted, he needed to see her…to hold her. He ran up the long flight of stairs up to Hikawa shrine, two steps at a time, and knocked on the front door. After a wait that seemed like an eternity, someone finally answered. “Mamoru-san?” Ami yawned, her tired eyes widening slightly when she saw him at the door. “What are you doing here?” “I need to see Usa-ko,” he said, still a little out of breath after his mad dash up to the shrine. He felt as if his heart was about to jump out of his chest. “Um, I’m afraid Usagi-chan is already asl--” “It’s important, Ami-chan. Please.” Ami hesitated, no doubt thinking him insane for insisting to see Usagi so late, the night before their wedding, no less, but agreed to go wake her up. A couple of minutes later, Usagi was at the door, yawning and rubbing at her crystal blue eyes. She was just as surprised to see him as Ami was. “Mamo-chan? Is something wrong?” Mamoru’s face broke into a huge grin the moment he saw her. “No, everything is great, now that you’re here,” he said, giving her a quick, but passionate kiss on the lips. “Wonderful, even.” Usagi arched an eyebrow. “Have you been out drinking with Motoki-kun and the others?” “I am perfectly sober, Usa-ko,” he assured her, knowing that his behavior was uncharacteristic of him. He didn’t blame her for thinking he was drunk. “In fact, I’ve never felt better in my entire life. I feel as if this huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders, and I can’t wait until tomorrow to finally make you my wife.” To prove it to her, Mamoru pulled Usagi toward him, kissing her once again. This time, however, it was long and fervent, Mamoru putting every ounce of his desire for her into the kiss, as if it was the last one they would ever have, instead of the first of many more to come. For as long as he lived, Mamoru vowed he would never take Usagi for granted ever again, that he would treat every touch, every kiss like the gift it was. Now that she was in his arms again, Mamoru could barely remember why he had doubted his feelings for her in the first place. “Wow,” Usagi breathed when they finally broke apart, looking dazed. She then shook her head, coming back to her senses. “I can’t wait until the wedding, either, but, Mamo-chan, it’s almost midnight, and Rei-chan says I’m getting up at eight o’clock sharp, even if she has to drag me out of bed, kicking and screaming, herself.” It was almost midnight? Mamoru knew it was late, but he didn’t realize it was that late. He sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. “Sorry, I really didn’t mean to come here so late and wake you up. I just had this sudden urge to see you, and I couldn‘t help myself.” Cradling her face in his hands, he asked, “Do you know just how beautiful you are?” She rolled her eyes. “Now, I know you’re drunk. I’m a complete mess,” she pointed out, indicating her less-than- stereotypically-sexy night clothes. “You’re always beautiful to me.” “Even in curlers and flannel pajamas?” “Especially in curlers and flannel pajamas.” There was no hint of sarcasm in his voice. Usagi could go bald and wear a burlap sack, and he would still think her the most beautiful woman in the world. Usagi smiled. “You’re lying, but I don’t care,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and standing up on tip-toe to give him a deep, lingering kiss that almost made Mamoru forget the real reason he had decided to come to Hikawa. He needed to tell her something -- something that he had said many times over the years, but never felt so deeply as he did at that moment. Reluctantly breaking off the kiss, Mamoru took both of Usagi’s hands in his own and took a deep breath to calm himself. As silly as it was, he felt as if he were saying the words for the very first time. “Usa-ko, I love you,” he declared, the words he had been trying so hard to find when writing his vows coming to him in a sudden flash of inspiration. “Not because you were Princess Serenity in the past, are Sailor Moon in the present, or will be Neo-Queen Serenity in the future, but because you are you, the kindest, most loving person I have ever had the honor of meeting. I don’t know what the future will hold for us, but I choose to spend that future with you: for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, for as long as we both shall live.” “Mamo-chan…” A faint blush colored Usagi’s cheeks, and she hid her face in his chest. “I love you, too, Mamo-chan,” she said, her voice cracking slightly, as if she was attempting not to cry. “You are the Prince Charming of my dreams, and even if I’m not much of a princess, I feel so lucky that you would choose me to be your wife. You have made me the happiest woman in the world.” “No, I’m the lucky one,” Mamoru corrected, lifting up Usagi’s chin and wiping away a few wayward tears that managed to roll down her face. “I don’t deserve you, but I swear from this moment on, I’m going to try to be the kind of man you can be proud to call your husband.” “You already are.” They were about to kiss again when they heard a chorus of “aww”s coming from inside the shrine. Usagi turned around and Mamoru looked up to find the other girls all awake and spying on them from the open front door, although Ami quickly backed away when she noticed they had been caught. From the looks of it, they had been watching almost the entire time. Mamoru bashfully rubbed at his neck, while Usagi blushed as bright as a tomato. “Uh, well, I should probably be heading home now,” Mamoru said. “Sorry again for waking you girls up. See you in the morning?” “She’ll be the one dressed in white,” Minako quipped, despite the question having been directed at Usagi. The other girls laughed. Mamoru smiled. “Then she’ll be easy to find.” Since the girls were there, Mamoru settled for giving Usagi a chaste kiss on the cheek. He then said goodbye to the others and headed back to his motorcyle, whistling “Here Comes the Bride” softly to himself. Mamoru couldn’t wait for tomorrow, and for the rest of their lives to begin. DISCLAIMER: Sailor Moon is the property of Takeuchi Naoko. AUTHOR'S NOTES: Any comments or criticisms can be sent to me at ElysionDream@aol.com. This fic was written for “the_sweet” as part of the sm_fanswap at Livejournal.