A Moment in Time
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A
Moment in Time
A
RahXephon fanfiction by regie27
Standard
Disclaimers Apply
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Warning:
Spoiler heavy. Based on the events of Episode 24,”Doorway to
the tuning.”
"You
passed me."
Haruka's
voice sounded bright, extracting him out of his thoughts. Kamina
Ayato knew he was about to step to the point of no return yet he felt
there was one more thing left unresolved. Following her voice, he
turned around to face her. Shitow Haruka made a gesture with her
hand. It was for a small difference, but he indeed stood taller than
her. It stroke him as funny how in the moments he had relied on her
strength and steadfast determination, she seemed larger than life,
like an angel on his shoulder who always came to his aid, her weapons
her endless capacity to care and her iron-willed persistence. But she
was right. He was taller.
"I
guess so." Ayato replied. The boy's face was serene, stoically
hiding the fact that he wanted to drown in the depths of her auburn
orbs and forget about his destiny. He silently cursed his blood for
condemning him to a fate he never had the chance to choose, but was
willed by others even before he was born. Suddenly, he noticed her
eyes brimmed with emotion. Her words were carefully spoken in a
gentle and slightly nervous voice:
"You
know, I've loved you for a long time. We were a couple back then we
were 14. You don't remember right, since they messed up with your
memory. But its okay, I just wanted to tell you because you were my
first love."
Kamina's
spirit rose to heights he never thought existed. It had at last been
said, and he felt his chest couldn't contain his heart from bursting
out. He understood that he too, had to say what he felt out loud, to
acknowledge to her and to himself what it had been silent for the
longest time.
"I
can't recall things from the past but I do know the present. The
person I love is the current you. I'm sorry for making you suffer all
this time."
Haruka
stood in awe, silently assimilating the impact of what Kamina had
just said. Ayato sensed the emotion in the air, the restlessness and
doubts inside giving way to a sense of peace. Her face was such a
beautiful sight to behold he wished he could immortalize it in a
painting. He understood that even with the words said out loud, the
burden of so many years wishing them to be said made her stand in the
brink of doubt, as if she dreaded it was all a dream. There was only
one way for him to demonstrate that this time it was real. His body
closed in on hers, her face reflecting the surprise and the fear of
being this the product of a cruel illusion. Kamina's gaze held hers
as his hands came to hold her cheeks. The skin felt silken beneath
his fingertips, soft and warm as he had always imagined. He inhaled
deeply, as his head initiated a path downwards to the place he knew
he was going to be welcomed.
Mustering
courage to allow live this even if it was conjured by her mind,
Haruka slowly parted her lips, smiling inwardly as their noses
brushed on the way. His lips touched hers, slowly and hesitant first,
then determined. The initial contact created a spark, then a bonfire
as the caress deepened. It was a gentle flame that menaced to grew
higher until it consumed all, waiting to be ignited again. Years of
waiting and longing came to a close. The path towards love and hope
was at last bridged with just one kiss.
He
could perceive her scent, a sweet yet somewhat slightly brisk aroma
that spoke of her gentleness as well of the lively, almost childlike
quality that made her so intriguing. He could feel her warmth
engulfing the both of them as she finally linked her arms around his
waist, her alluring softness eliciting the need to keep her close to
him, to feel more of her. He silently prayed he never had to let go.
It felt like the world had come to a stop for a brief yet intense
moment but alas, too soon it had again begun to move forward, leaving
them and their newfound happiness behind. Just two more casualties
that time left in its inexorable wake.
"I've
always loved you, Kamina-kun," Haruka said, her voice drowned in
emotion as she held him close. Long tears of unabashed happiness
dampened her cheeks.
Kamina
couldn't muster any words to come out. His emotions came crashing as
the waves of a tempestuous sea to the shore. It is too soon, there
are so many things I have yet to do…with you, he thought
relishing the moment that he understood bitterly was about to end.
His eyes shut tightly and his mind tried to block out the cacophony
of the Lilia Litvyak's sirens to no avail. Reluctantly, he forced his
lids to open, knowing that doing so meant returning to the bitter
reality at hand and away from the safety and warmth of Haruka's arms.
As he pulled away ever so slowly, he caught a glimpse of silvery
beams of piercing light materializing at the feet of the RahXephon.
"Itxli,"
Ayato murmured.
Ayato
moved away from Haruka and towards the RahXephon and his other self.
"Ayato?"
Haruka looked at him with a quizzical expression. The gusts of air
that blew over the deck felt cool over her skin, already missing his
comforting warmth.
Ixtli
met halfway with Ayato, a small smile curving her lips. Her voice was
melodic. "The Ollin has attained Yolteotl, yet his human heart
refuses the trappings of a god. You have made a wish deep inside your
soul and you know you possess the tools to see it through. Do you
wish to?"
"Yes,
I want to. I wish it with all my might. For me…and for the one
I want to protect."
"Remember
Ollin, even if this wish is granted, it will only delay the
inevitable."
"Even
if it is that way, I have to. There's still one more thing for me to
do before I can move on without regrets."
Ixtli
smiled again, amused by the vehemence in his words. Turning around,
the yellow scarf of her dress floating about with the wind that swept
over the aircraft carrier, she softly said:
"Go
then Ollin, the RahXephon awaits."
Haruka
was observing Ayato, who was in the trance-like state like she had
seen many times before and ran towards him. She caught his hand as he
turned around to acknowledge her presence.
"Captain
Shitow, please hurry!" the evacuation sergeant yelled. The hum
of the last lifeboat droned, signaling her imminent departure, their
imminent separation. Again, the forces of fate confabulated to keep
them away from each other.
"Ayato."
A single tear ran down her cheek. His fingers caught it before it
fell down. "I…"
"No.
Don't leave. Come with me!"
"Where,
I don't understand?"
Determination
crossed his face. "I want you to trust me on this.”
His
eyes beckoned her to follow. She nodded.
“Aishiteru,
Haruka,” he whispered. Then, at the top his lungs Kamina
exclaimed:
“RAHXEPHON!”
And
then all that Haruka saw was the blinding light that swept her away.
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Shitow
Haruka opened her eyes, finding herself in the comforting familiarity
of her bed. The TERRA officer lifted her head from the feather pillow
as she tried to organize her thoughts. “Where am I? What I'm
doing here? The MU attacks, Tokyo Jupiter...what's going on? …”
Then
she remembered. The deck of the Lilia Litvyak, the evacuation of
TERRA's personnel after Operation Downfall went awfully wrong,
Commander Kunugi's heroic last stand…
“Ayato…”
Instinctively, she brought her fingers towards her lips. The memories
came in a cavalcade. “My confession, his confession…”
Her
body maneuvered towards the window, expecting the levitating cities
of the MU floating ominously overhead, expecting scores of Dolems
circling around the sky blowing to smithereens anything that dared
crossed its path.
Nothing.
The firmament was clear and cloudless. The sun shone brightly. Only
birds crossed the sky.
“Haruka,
are you awake?” A voice, his voice called from outside. Her
heart raced.
“Ayato?”
His
silhouette appeared on the frame of her door holding two steaming
cups. “Oh, hello there. I brought you some coffee. I thought
you might want some.”
“Coffee
sounds really good,” she replied. Haruka observed Ayato
carefully, measuring every gesture and every move. She wasn't sure if
her memories were accurate or a mere dream. She took her cup and
brought the hot liquid towards her lips, savoring the brew as her
brain kicked in the trained eye of the Intel Officer. There was
something in his demeanor that stroke her as, well, different. He
seemed more casual; in fact he seemed happier that she could remember
seeing him recently. Could it be that what she recalled had been
true?
Ayato
assessed her with an expression of concern and inquest. Suddenly, his
eyes shimmered with what she could swear was mischief. Her eyes
roamed quizzically his face, trying to guess out his thoughts.
“You
have your spook face on Haruka.”
“What…what
does that's supposed to mean?” she replied slightly rattled.
“The
way your eyes focus and your eyebrows come together. That's usually
when you are very concentrated, immersed in some deep thought, trying
to find out what's going on. Has someone ever mentioned how adorable
you look doing that captain?”
Haruka's
expression changed from caution to downright befuddlement.
Ayato's
heartfelt laughter confused her even more as her cheeks blushed,
reacting to the “adorable” portion of the sentence.
Frustrated, Haruka stood up in front of Ayato, hands over her hips.
Obviously irritated, she replied:
“You
need to do some explaining, young man. I don't know what the hell is
going on but…”
The
rest of the sentence never came out as Ayato firmly put his lips over
Haruka's. She felt her anger subsiding by the pleasurable sensation
of the caress. His hands held her shoulders firmly, as his mouth
gently invited her to reply, which she did in earnest. Not wanting to
dwell on more distracting thoughts for the moment being, Haruka
allowed herself to enjoy the pleasant kiss. She didn't need any
explanations; this was more than enough answer for her. Her arms came
around his neck, pulling him closer for a hot, exploratory kiss.
After a glorious instant that for her ended too soon, Ayato pulled
back flustered, as he obviously fought to gather his breath. She
flashed a sly smile, amused by the fact she had rendered him
practically breathless.
“Guess
I can interpret this as a no,” she commented with an impish
grin.
“A
no?” Ayato asked still inhaling deeply.
“As,
no, I didn't imagine the whole deal at the Lilia Litvyak, which leads
me to my next question.” Her features suddenly sobered. “Where
are we and what happened. I can only remember you calling on the
RahXephon and a blinding light, and when I opened my eyes, I find
myself back at Nirai-Kanai, at home, in my room.”
“I
sort of have answers to all of those, but you might want to bring
your coffee with you. Come, I'll try to explain.”
Following
Ayato outside, Haruka quipped: “somehow I feel that no matter
what you say, I'll remain confused.”
Grinning,
Ayato replied: “I know the feeling perfectly.”
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“So
basically what you intend to explain is that the RahXephon can
actually alter time?”
Haruka's
back snuggled over Ayato's chest, as she felt his chin slightly brush
the top of her head. Her glance was lost among the vastness of the
blue sea, yet to be tainted by war and destruction. Ayato leaned
against the wall beside the main rice paper door that led to the
house. His arms came around her shoulders and his fingers
absentmindedly ran the length of her arms. From their vantage point
outside the Rikudoh/Shitow/Kamina household, they could see not much
further away, the colossal outline of the RahXephon towering over
everything around.
“I
know it sounds hard to believe but think about it. You know very well
that the Absolute Barrier over Tokyo Jupiter slowed time inside. The
small shrine I got lost at also had that effect, and I can even
recall a moment in which I sort of motioned time back when I fought
the twin Dolems alongside Elvy's Vermillion.”
“So
that would explain why Helena's findings differed from our record of
the battle” Haruka murmured to herself.
“You
said something?”
“Never
mind. But this means we have traveled back in time?”
“I
believe this is a similar experience. Nirai-Kanai was obliterated
where we come from, but here everything's normal.”
“But
still, in a sense I'm not sure we have gone back. It just does not
feel like the past.”
“I
know. Itxtli told me that the innermost wish in my heart was to be
granted. At that moment at the deck with you in my arms, I wished
with all my heart for more time with you. I really longed for an
opportunity to share more time with you, like we did at the Miura
Peninsula, when it was just the two of us.”
“I
really cherish those days, but I didn't know it had meant so much for
you too. I was a complete stranger to you then. I mean, I was the
person who had basically kidnapped from your home and confronted you
with the harsh reality.”
“I
know. The reality check you dumped upon me felt like the proverbial
cold shower but your presence, even then, somehow eased the hurt. The
food wasn't that great and the rooming was Spartan at best but the
company was amazing. Besides, I think you had a blast playing dress
up at my expense.”
“That
was because you had lousy taste. You must admit you looked much
better with my choice.” Haruka smiled, holding his hands
tightly. Ayato smiled back and placed a feathery kiss on her cheek.
“So
Ayato, what do you think happened. Did the RahXephon really alter
time and space?”
“I'm
not sure but perhaps this is like when I was almost swallowed by the
Dolem with the negative energy field. While I was struggling to get
out, I was induced into a sort of living dreamscape. I was
transported back to Tokyo Jupiter as I had left it. I saw my mother,
my home, my friends…”
Ayato
paused, as the sad realization of what had become of Asahina and what
Mamoru turned out to be struck him. Haruka could almost read his
thoughts as his blue gaze was shrouded for an instant by shadows of
grief and guilt.
“I
understand. You returned to what you longed for the most at that
specific moment.”
“It
was more than that. It was the manifestation of what I thought I
wanted my ideal world to be. Everything I thought I wished for was a
reality in that dreamscape. Perhaps, this is another manifestation of
that motivated by my inner feelings. I wanted to relive a similar
experience like that on the Miura Peninsula, but in a place I could
call my own. In the end, it is here were I felt home.”
“Was
it anybody else on that other experience? Megumi or Quon perhaps…”
“Actually
I did saw uncle Rikudoh and you were also there but…it wasn't
really you.”
“What
do you mean by that?”
Blushing
deeply, Ayato coughed nervously:
“You
have to remember I was really confused and afraid of what I was
feeling for you back then. It was rather embarrassing and I wasn't
even sure if it was appropriate for me to think of you like that…”
“You
mean as in…”
Ayato
nodded, feeling his cheeks were beet red by now.
“It
was so overwhelming I didn't know what to do or think. The you in my
dream confronted me with the fact that I was more attracted to you
that I wanted to admit. Then my not too collaborating hormones
intervened and then all became really embarrassing. It was somewhat
intimidating to see that aggressive side of yours, not that it should
surprise me in the least knowing how you subdued two armed MU
henchmen by yourself. But that other Haruka practically jumped on me
and she could be really…persuasive.” Ayato stopped
talking as he tried to somehow block the troubling scene that his
mind fixated in relive and its subsequent effects on his mind and
body. He made the conscious effort not to stare at her bosom as he
had found himself doing in other occasions. By now, the incriminating
blush had spread up to his ears. A sympathetic smile curved on
Haruka’s lips. As she turned around to face him, the
short-haired captain quipped:
“That's
okay. You don't need to explain. At least this serves to explain your
weird reactions afterwards, like that time when you fled from the
elevator when we were alone.”
“That
was really stupid of me. I'm sorry.”
“I
must admit I felt really hurt by that. I raked my head all day trying
to understand what I had done for you to react that way. To think it
was all because that ecchi mind of yours created a version of
me whose only purpose was to seduce you,” Haruka added with
mock annoyance.
“You
make it sound like it were such a bad thing,” Ayato replied
impishly.
“So
that means it is not a bad thing now Kamina?” she asked in a
challenging tone.
“You
really want to know Shitow?” replied Ayato with the same
challenging nuance in his voice.
“Well,
of course. I don't want to do anything to you that can end up with
you fleeing from my mere presence.”
Ayato's
leaned towards her, so close she sensed his hot breath against her
face. She inhaled sharply. “That was then when I was confused
and didn't know better. Now…I wouldn’t want it any other
way.”
Haruka
was at a loss for words. Her mind raced as his gaze remained fixated
on her intently. The playfulness of his voice had vanished, leaving
in its wake a vehement tone that made her skin shiver.
“Ayato,
I…”
“I
don't think I need to say it because you know it better than myself,
of how much I want you. It's so intense it's almost frightening but
it is very much real. Part of my wish was the chance to be with you
at least once.”
Haruka’s
heart quickened. She felt the air around them suddenly smoldering and
felt the need to fill her lungs with air. She could almost hear the
crackle of electricity running from him towards her, so intense and
heartfelt their emotions ran at that instant. She recognized the
yearning in his voice and she felt she would melt at the way his
dilated pupils shimmered. She never felt more compelled to reach out
and touch him. Her hands obeyed this silent command as they ran down
his cheeks and jaw, holding his soul searing gaze with her own. It
was utter happiness, but here was a disquieting inflection in his
voice that somewhat hinted to a hidden fear that tore at her heart
and nagged her. Running her fingers through his thick hair, she
replied vehemently:
“But
why you talk like that as if you weren’t going to return? Don't
scare me like that.” Haruka couldn't help the obvious panic
that drenched her voice.
“It's
just that I couldn't forgive myself, after all this wasted time, that
even with all my effort and my will I fail, at least I'll be content
in having been able to share this with you.”
Haruka’s
features became rigid, her frustration and the dread of losing him
again manifesting.
“You
better stop this nonsense right now Kamina Ayato. I haven't gone this
far just to lose you again.”
He
looked at her with a mixture of helplessness and guilt, his glance
dropping to the floor. It tore him apart too but he was the Ollin.
There was no escaping that fact no matter how much he tried to run.
“Haruka,
I don't want to lose you either, but I don't know what I'm getting
into.”
She
lifted his chin, forcing him to look at her. “Whatever it is, I
know you pull through, because you know who you are, despite what the
others want you to be.” Her voice was firm, full of conviction
and intensity. He knew that tone well, for it was the one she used so
many times to snap him out of his hopelessness when he had almost
given up.
“Haruka…”
Ayato muttered “I’m so sorry for making you worry like
this.”
Unable
to withstand her emotions anymore, Haruka burrowed her head against
his chest as tears dampened his shirt. His arms came around her, his
cheek brushing her silken short hair.
“With
you I will always know who I am. Others see me as the instrumentalist
or the Ollin, but with you, I always find my way to my true self.
Thank you for always loving me for who I am, Haruka.” Lifting
her tear stricken face, he added in a more cheerful manner:
“I
think we’ve have had enough of angst and tears for the day.
What do you say if we get something for dinner?”
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“And
that’s me at my promotion party. As you can see Elvy and the
rest of the Alpha Squadron were really enjoying themselves. They
managed to smuggle some authentic rum from the Caribbean, and you
better never tell this to anyone because it is illegal. I’m
sure Commander Kunugi knew something was fishy but since he had a
couple of Cuba Libre’s himself, he didn’t say a word
about it.”
Stretching
her arms above her, Haruka sighed loudly while Ayato kept flipping
the pictures while drinking the remaining of his green tea. As her
chopsticks picked the last rice ball dipped in mayonnaise, she added:
“and with this we’ve pretty much covered what I’ve
been up to this past 15 years or so.”
“I
can’t still absorb the fact that you have such a lifetime
behind and that I've. What I’ve done since we last saw each
other in Tokyo is nothing compared to what you’ve
accomplished.”
“I
don’t think I would have done half of it if circumstances had
been different. I don’t regret it though. The experiences I’ve
gained, the friends I’ve met are things I value and have shaped
me into who I am today. I don’t think the 14 year old me would
have thought she could be capable of piloting aircrafts or doing
secret agent type stuff. And I don’t think what you’ve
done is nothing. It’s just that your mind was messed up with
and you weren’t aware of what you had truly lived. I'd always
admired your passion for painting. In fact, that was your dream back
then, to become a professional painter.” Suddenly, Haruka
seemed to go adrift amidst her own thoughts, scanning the pictures as
her fingers toyed with an empty teacup.
“Are
you okay?” Ayato inquired.
Her
lips curved into a small smile and sighed: “I’m just
thinking about Megu-chan and Elvy and Yagumo-kun. I hope they are
okay.”
“I
don’t think they’ll notice we’re gone. If we return
at the same point we left, it will be like none of this happened.
They should be alright. “
“I
hope so. They’re all very special, you know…”
“Yes,
they are indeed extraordinary. I haven’t been the easiest
person to deal with, but I know they really care for me. Even Elvy
with her tough façade, I think she’s taken a liking of
me”
“I
know she’s capable of liking you even more given the right
amount of alcohol” Haruka retorted mischievously, already
anticipating his reaction.
“You
had to remind me that,” Ayato retorted mortified. The memory of
the tough as nails pilot almost groping him made him fluster up to
his ears.
“It’s
just that you look so cute when you are embarrassed. Besides she did
say you were quite good looking. I was pretty jealous, you know, but
I couldn’t show it back then.”
“Shitow
Haruka, jealous?” Ayato was taken aback by the fact. He smiled
inwardly, delighting in the knowledge that beneath her impassible
coolness she hid such feelings. It must have been hard for her to
hide it that day at the beach, with Cathy and Elvy prancing around in
their bikinis. Then again, it hadn't been easy for him neither once
he’d noticed hers and after that, he pretty much ignored the
others. Before allowing his mind to ponder further on how good she
looked in the bikini, Ayato kicked himself mentally.
“Of
course. I’m very much aware of the fact that TERRA’s
female employees are very attractive,” Haruka added. “If
you didn’t notice, when you arrived, you were the flavor of the
month so I knew all attention was on you. There’s also the fact
I wasn’t sure if you had a girlfriend back in Tokyo and I
didn’t have the right to be bothered by it.”
“I
felt more like a lab rat or an animal in the verge of extinction than
a sex-symbol with all that unwanted attention.”
“But
a very cute lab rat, if you ask me.” Haruka laughed as she
winked playfully at Ayato. Her laughter was so contagious he joined
in. Suddenly, an idea popped in his mind.
“Haruka,
do you have pictures of us back then at Tokyo, before the barrier?”
The
question took the TERRA officer by surprise. “Why the sudden
curiosity? I don’t think you’ll be able to remember
anything.”
“I
know, but still, I would like to see how we used to look.”
“If
that’s what you want.” Haruka stood up and headed to her
room. “Now where did I put those?” Her voice came out
muffled, as if she were inside a closet. Ayato could hear the opening
and closing of drawers and the sound of rustling of clothes and
papers shuffling along with her occasional mumbling.
“There,
I think I found them. Kami-sama, it’s been so long since I last
looked at this album.” The nostalgia in her voice was evident.
“Ayato, come here and watch your step. I had to engage in a
major search mission to find this and it shows. I‘ve always
kept these hidden, you know? Not even Megu knows about it.”
Ayato
stood up from the dinner table and entered Haruka’s room,
threading carefully to avoid stepping on anything. The TERRA captain
was already sitting down on the edge of her bed surrounded by several
pictures and albums. Over her lap she held one with a blue cover. He
took a seat beside her.
“Well,
that’s me at 13. Cute , huh?” she said pointing at a
picture.
Ayato’s
eyes opened wide in surprise. The smiling young Haruka in the picture
was the spitting image of Ixtli. The same long hair, the intense
auburn eyes, the slender figure of a girl in the threshold towards
womanhood. Then, it really dawned on him what she had explained
before achieving Yolteotl. The likeness she used to lure him to find
her on the day of Operation Overlord had been Haruka’s all
along; the Haruka he had met once and whose impact had been such in
his life her imprint had stubbornly refused to fade away with the
rest of his lost and tampered memories.
After
all this time, the elusive girl he constantly painted, the girl he
looked for desperately had always been her. Ayato felt a lump forming
on his throat. His fingers kept turning the pages until his eyes
caught an image of the both of them looking carefree and happy, hands
joined together and smiles perched in both their faces. Ayato felt
Haruka’s gaze over him and his eyes shifted from the younger
version of her to behold intently the current one. The intensity of
the warm, hazelnut eyes had actually increased over time, he
realized, and it was obvious she wasn’t a child anymore, yet
the lively sparkle, the gentle smile were still there, more beautiful
than ever.
“Haruka,
all this time…it was you, it had always been you who I’d
searched for!” Tears started to gather in Ayato’s blue
eyes. Haruka stared at him dumbfounded, feeling tears of her own
trickling down her cheeks.
“Ayato…”
The
boy threw himself into Haruka’s welcoming arms, feeling a sense
of closure washing over him. The missing piece of the puzzle of his
soul had finally been found. With her so close, he found solace and a
sense of inner peace that had been amiss for so long. At last, Kamina
Ayato found his way home. They held each other in silence, the ties
that had bound them to a sense of emptiness and solitude at last
severed, replaced by an overwhelming love that even time could not
defeat nor dim.
“I
love you Ayato” Haruka whispered, embracing him tightly. Ayato
smiled as he brushed her forehead with a feathery kiss.
“I
know Haruka. I love you too.”
Longing
for the unmistakable physical manifestation of their emotions, Haruka
tilted her head towards his, her lips slightly parted in an
invitation he couldn’t refuse. That wasn’t the only thing
that she was about to offer as their mouths sought to placate the
passion that burned inside their hearts.
Ayato
felt himself falling until his back touched the surface of the bed.
Haruka towered over him, arms at either side of his shoulders, her
face so close to his her bangs tickled his temples. Her warm hazelnut
gaze darkened with a need fueled by long years of wait. His fingers
sank into her hair, ever so slowly closing the gap between their
lips. Her sultry voice brought shivers to his spine as she whispered
against his mouth:
“Ayato,
let me show you my love.”
This
time, Kamina accepted all she offered and more.
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Haruka
sighed contently as she ran her fingertips over Ayato's stomach and
over the strange marking that had identified him as an
instrumentalist. He stirred slightly at the feather light touch but
remained submerged in his blissful slumber. The TERRA officer basked
in the delight of just observing him sleep, feeling herself too
restless to do the same. She had waited so long for this moment she
couldn't convince herself of closing her eyes, fearing that the
instant she woke up, he'll be gone. Haruka watched his features
carefully, noticing that his face already showed the transition
between boy and man. Haruka snuggled closer, luxuriating in the
warmth and firmness of his body against hers. Her thoughts moved with
the ebb and flow of the tides, not really centering on anything
specific, just the overall sense of comfort and fulfillment. All of a
sudden, her eyes caught something unusual. A shimmering beam of pure
light filtering just outside her door stirred her attention.
Reluctantly, Haruka moved away from her lover to inquest on the
curious light. Putting a robe on, she moved outside searching for the
source of the phenomenon. The wooden floor felt cold beneath her
feet. What or rather who she saw waiting was most unexpected.
“Mishima
Haruka. I see the Ollin is still with you. I can sense he has found
contentment in his heart. I’m so happy for him.” The
melodious, soft voice of Ixtli dressed in her iconic yellow dress
greeted her.
“Who
are you…why do you…look like me?” Haruka stared
at Ixtli in disbelief. The girl was exactly as she had been 15 years
ago. Was this the being Ayato referred to as Mishima Reika, the
spirit that inhabited the RahXephon?
“I
am Ixtli, I am the true face of the Xephon. I have been the guidepost
for the Ollin to find his path towards the tuning of the world. The
form you see is what the Ollin wished to see the most in his heart.”
A
flash of recognition suddenly hit Haruka. She had talked to this
girl, but then she had been wearing a TERRA lieutenant’s
uniform. “I…I think I remember you now. You talked to me
dressed as I used to look when I first arrived at TERRA.”
Ixtli
nodded. “Yes Haruka, you have seen me before as well. Do you
know why I am here?”
Haruka’s
face went grim. “Yes I do. You have come for him.”
“Yes,
the Ollin needs to fulfill his destiny, but in order for him to
follow his path, you must let him go.” Ixtli’s
mesmerizing voice was firm.
Haruka
felt anger forming on the pit of her stomach. Her hands balled into
fists at her sides. “Why, why does he have to do something he
doesn’t wish to? He never had the chance to choose any of
this!” she screamed.
Itxli
remained serene. Her eyes assessed Haruka with curiosity. She could
sense the other's spirit seething with righteous rage. “One’s
path is not always clear and his was shrouded to all, especially to
himself. It is imperative he tunes the world. If this is not
achieved, it will be the end for this world. Fate and his bloodline
have picked him and he must do what he’s been called to.”
“No!
It can be!” Haruka felt a cold shudder running down her spine.
The fate of the whole world had been pilled over Ayato's shoulders
just like that. Her voice trembled by the impact of the revelation.
“I didn’t know but I can’t let him go just like
this!”
“You
know his heart well. He will go back to you. He has already done so.”
Her unexpected reassuring smile surprised the TERRA officer. Haruka
meditated on Ixtli’s words. She was right. He had found his way
back to her despite the Absolute Barrier and time. Humanity needed
him. She didn’t have any other choice but to let him go.
Gathering the strength she required for this sacrifice, she
whispered:
“I
understand. Now, go to him.”
“Thank
you. And Haruka…”
“Yes?”
“You’ve
made him really happy. You have made him experience his humanity
fully and showed him the true power of love. Without you, he might
have been hollow and lost. He will always treasure what you’ve
done for him in his heart.”
Haruka
couldn’t reply. Her throat felt the surge of emotion seeping
in, as hot tears fell to her feet. She hated it, the helplessness she
felt, unable to do anything but this time, this was bigger than her.
She could only wait. And hope. And pray.
As
she silently cried her soul out, Ayato was stirred from his sleep by
Ixtli. Instants later, already dressed, he moved towards Haruka who
was waiting for him at the door, he glance lost in the sea. His hand
came to rest over her shoulder. Why it had to hurt so much? he
wondered. Why it felt like his heart was being ripped in half?
“Haruka,
I do this because I wish to protect you.”
She
turned around on her heels to face him. Her eyes were red and puffy;
her voice came out slightly hoarse. “I know. I’ll be
okay. We need to go. The world awaits you.”
It
pained him immensely to see her this way. After apologizing about
hurting her before, he was doing it all over again. Why he had to
hurt what he cared for the most in his life? Unable to find answers
to these contradictions that plagued him, Ayato gathered Haruka in
his arms, trying to absorb strength from her warmth, trying to find
peace amidst the storm. He sensed her heart beating in unison with
his. He gazed at her eyes, capturing her lips one last time. As they
parted, he solemnly promised:
“I’ll
return to you no matter what.”
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
"Captain
Shitow, please hurry!"
Haruka
blinked, as the voice of the evacuation sergeant brought her out her
reverie. Her feet stood firmly upon the deck of the Lilia Litvyak.
The loud racket of battles still away from them exploded around,
bringing the echoes of terror and death to their ears. The sirens
kept their incessant scream and upon the sea, rescue boats, carriers
and all vessels from TERRA and the Federation’s fleet
crisscrossed its surface, leaving foaming white trails. Towering
above her, the RahXephon shrouded with a long shadow both her and his
owner. Her glance locked with Ayato’s, searching for a sign, a
silent confirmation of what had just happened had been real. Sensing
the unspoken question in Haruka’s eyes, Ayato nodded as his
hands reached for hers, holding them firmly.
“Aishiteru
Haruka. Thank you, for everything. Now go. I'll come back no matter
what so…"”
“Aishiteru
Ayato. I’ll be waiting. I’ll always be waiting.”
“Now,
hurry!”
Willing
all her might to move her feet, Haruka let go his hands and ran
towards the evacuation crew. Standing to face him one more time
before descending, Haruka's mind burned an imprint of this instant,
keeping it inside the vault of her most treasured memories. Ayato’s
silhouette became smaller as she nimbly stepped down the long
staircase until she boarded, leaving him behind.
Ayato
watched as her boat began its trek away from the aircraft carrier and
away from the upcoming and imminent battlefield between MU and
mankind. Remembering his mission, he entered the quarters to ready
himself for his upcoming journey with the RahXephon. As he donned his
life support unit, his eyes fixated on the porthole, as he watched
the boat and the person that he loved the most disappear into the
horizon:
Lifting
his gaze towards the heavens, the boy about to become a god vowed:
“This
time for sure.”
~.~
Fin ~.~
Author’s
Notes:
The
dialogue featured in both the opening and ending sequences were
quoted from the subtitled version.
I’m
aware that I might have pushed the premise of the time altering
properties of the RahXephon (although, being him a god, he can pretty
much do what he pleases) a bit too far to make this work, but I felt
what I wanted to do with this story was more relevant that sticking
too faithfully to the series. I hope you can bear with me on that.
Aside that creative leap of faith, everything pretty much follows the
canon and doesn’t really alter the subsequent timeline or
events. It’s just that I wanted to give these characters a
little more time to share with each other after they confess their
feelings and I felt this was a good moment for it.
Hope
you’ve enjoyed it. Thanks for reading!