Revenge is Best Served at 2:00 A
Revenge is Best Served at 2:00 A.M.
By Kevin McHorney.
Sailor Moon and all characters created by Naoko Takeuchi.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP, click. Makoto sighed as she
heard Minako mutter a curse and crawl out of bed. The apartment the two of
them had shared for the past three months
was freezing and Makoto pulled her covers tighter around her.
Minako’s work for the university television
station as a morning news commentator meant that she could use the studio’s
showers and dressing area. At four-thirty in
the morning she only had to spend a few minutes in the apartment, which suited
Makoto perfectly. Her first class at the cooking conservatory wasn’t until ten
and if Minako spent any more time at home in the mornings Makoto wouldn’t be
able to get back to sleep. She heard the
deadbolt on the front door lock and fell back into a dream about a man with
soft brown hair and a warm smile.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. Makoto looked around
blearily. The clock on her nightstand said 4:35. She hit it a couple of times until she realized that it wasn’t making the
noise. She pulled the covers over her head, leaving only her pony-tail exposed
and swore, “Dammit, Minako, that’s the third time this month!” She listened to
the beeping and tried willing it to shut itself off, but the alarm kept going. Angrily, she tore her covers off,
stalked to Minako’s nightstand and shut the alarm off. She started back to her
own bed when her foot caught on something warm and furry. Makoto pinwheeled
her arms and screamed as she fell.
“Ouch. Do I attract feet or something?” Artemis
said with a groan. He looked at where Makoto lay sprawled on the ground. “Oh,
Makoto, are you all right? I thought it was Minako again.” Makoto swore under
her breath and made no attempt to get up.
Artemis looked around in confusion. “It’s still dark, what are you doing up
this early?”
“I’m awake because my damned roommate forgot to
turn off her alarm clock again. I swear, I’m going to kill her this time.”
“Actually, I have a better idea. How would you like to get her back and teach her to
turn her alarm off at the same time?” Artemis asked. Makoto looked at him
quizzically. He took her silence as an invitation to continue. “Minako
doesn’t have work tomorrow, and she’s already told me how much she’s looking forward to sleeping in.”
Makoto nodded as Artemis continued, “So here’s what we do, first call Rei and
ask if we can stay with her tonight. Then we…”
*****
“I’m home,” Minako called as she kicked the door
shut behind her.
“Hi, Minako,”
Makoto called from the kitchen, “anything interesting happen today?”
“Yeah, one of the teachers was arrested for drunk
driving last night so we had a great story this morning. Other than that
classes were boring as usual.” Minako walked into the kitchen and saw Makoto dressed in jeans and a jacket and packing food
into lunchboxes. Minako cocked her head to one side and asked, “What’s going
on?”
“Oh yeah, I’m going to be spending the night at
Rei’s tonight. Also, Artemis said he’d be out all night too and not to wait up for him.” She finished with the food and put
the boxes into a duffle bag sitting next to the stove.
“You mean I’ll have the place to myself tonight?
That doesn’t happen too often.”
“Yeah, so please, try not to burn the place down.”
Minako glared and said, “That was Usagi, not me.
I haven’t burned anything.” Makoto stared at her. “Ok, I haven’t burned
anything this year.”
“Right, well have a good night. I hope you sleep
well,” Makoto said with a smile. She picked up her bag and walked out.
Minako locked the door and said, “I will, I
haven’t been able to sleep in in forever.”
*****
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. Minako woke with a start.
“Huh, wha?” she said as she whipped her head around, trying to find the source
of the noise. She looked at her clock which
said 2:00 but wasn’t beeping. She got out of bed and followed the noise to one
of her stuffed animals. She reached behind and pulled out a small alarm
clock. “What the?” her voice trailed off as she turned off the clock and got back into bed.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. Minako bolted upright
again. She looked at her alarm clock which now read 2:30, but still wasn’t
beeping. Then she looked at the small alarm clock which was also silent.
“What’s going on?” she asked no one as she
once again got out of bed. This time she found the clock behind one of
Makoto’s trophies. Minako shook her head in confusion, turned this clock off
and set it next to the first clock. She stared at them for a moment, then
crawled back into bed.
COCK A DOODLE DOO! IT’S THREE O’CLOCK! COCK A
DOODLE DOO! IT’S THREE O’CLOCK! Minako screamed as she jumped out of bed.
She stood panting and clutching her chest as the latest alarm clock called out
its song. Minako stalked over to her dresser and found the offending timepiece in her underwear drawer. She growled
and worked the buttons on the clock, but couldn’t figure how to turn it off.
Finally she yanked the batteries out and threw the clock with the others.
Minako didn’t even bother to get under her
covers, she simply flopped on her bed and went back to sleep.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. Minako rolled over and fell
off of her bed with a yelp. She sat up and said, “Someone’s going to die for
this. Now where is it?” She reached under her bed and pulled out yet another alarm clock. She mashed the off button and
dropped it on the rest of the clocks. “That’s it, I’ll get the rest before
they can go off.” Minako tore the bedroom apart. She pulled out all the
drawers, checked all of the animals and
trophies, searched under both beds. Minako even stopped the ceiling fan and
examined the blades, but she didn’t find any more clocks. “That better be the
end of this little joke.”
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. “But I searched everywhere
already!” Minako hollered. She got up and
dragged her feet over to Makoto’s nightstand. It was Makoto’s alarm clock that
was beeping this time. Minako swore and turned it off and glared at the 4:30
cheerfully shining back at her. Then she noticed the note sitting behind the clock.
‘Minako. I hope you liked our little presents for
you. Oh, and in the future please remember to turn off your alarm clock in the
morning. Oh, and watch where you step, cats don’t make good doormats. Makoto
and Artemis. P.S. I promise, that was the
last one.’
Minako dropped the note and chortled. “I’m going
to kill them both. Slowly and painfully.” She yawned loudly. “Next time I
see them. I swear.” Minako dropped back into her bed and stared at the
ceiling until she finally fell back to
sleep. Moments later her clock hit 4:35 and began to beep.
End
Thank you to Gary Kleppe, Nidoking and Karaohki for critiquing this at
last month’s FFIRC one-hour challenge.
The cock-a-doodle-doo clock really exists and had a close call with being thrown overboard many a time.
