My sister is Sailor Moon.

I saw her transform before my very eyes, but I can’t believe it. How can somebody so stupid, so klutzy, so utterly irresponsible be the famed champion of love and justice, Sailor Moon? The thought blows my mind. All my illusions are shattered.

To think I thought Sailor Moon was so awesome, only to discover her alter ego is none other than my idiot older sister Usagi. I even thought she was kind of cute! Yuck! How sick is that?

But she did save me from that freaky monster today. That was pretty nice of her, I guess -- especially when she shielded me from the monster’s attack. It looked like she was in a lot of pain when it hit her, but Usagi still protected me. She didn’t even cry about it! She just told me to run, then turned around and kicked the bad guy in the stomach, like something out of a kung-fu movie.

Okay, that was freaking cool, I have to admit. Maybe I’ll ask her to teach me how to do that…

Oh, and the cat talks, too! I nearly forgot about that. Luna always seemed smarter than the average feline, but never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine she could speak fluent Japanese.

This is crazy. Maybe it was all a dream. It has to be a dream, right?

But it’s not. Usagi is Sailor Moon, and she has a talking cat named Luna. This is reality, and I have to accept it, no matter how strange and nonsensical it may be.

Funny, but I have to admit I think my sister is kind of cool now. Just a little, though. A miniscule amount, really.

Okay… Maybe a lot cool.

Just don’t tell her I said that.

DISCLAIMER: Sailor Moon is the property of Naoko Takeuchi.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Any comments or criticisms can be sent to me at ElysionDream@aol.com. Written for the “Innocent Bystander” challenge at the “sailormoonland” community at Livejournal.